Growing Older and Aging Gracefully

Aging gracefully is about enjoying life. For example, I'm sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt. Agatha Christie knew about aging gracefully when she said: "An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have:  the older she gets, the more interested he is in her."

Aging with Humor

Do you like quick one-liners and jokes about aging and getting older? Amuse your friends, tease your grand-kids, and drive your spouse crazy. For example, "I had amnesia once".  "Or maybe it was twice." And then there's, "I used to be indecisive, not I'm not sure."

"I'm speeding because I have to get there before I forgot where I'm going."

Funny Thoughts & Stories About Aging

Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age, and start bragging about it.  The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.  More thoughts about aging.

How to be Environmentally Green

Checking out at the store, the young cashier suggested to the older woman that she didn't know how to be green, and should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren't good for the environment.  The woman apologized and explained, "We didn't have this  GREEN  THING  back in my earlier days."  "Are you sure you really know how to be green young lady?". . .

A Parable of Four Worms

A minister determined a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars.  The first worm was put into a container of . .

young well dressed business manWhat a Woman Wants in a Man

What a Woman Wants in a Man at age 22, handsome. What a Woman Wants in a Man at age 32, remembers anniversaries, What a Woman Wants in a Man at age 52, usually remembers punch line of jokes, What a Woman Wants in a Man at age 62 ...

"If you lie about your age on your birthday, make sure you pick a comfortable number."

What I've Learned in 50 Years

10 Things it Took me 50 Years to learn.  Never take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.  There can be a fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness". Never lick a steak knife.

"Don't think of it as hot flashes. Think of it as your inner child playing with matches."

A Beautiful Message

Here's a beautiful message about growing old. Okay. Be ready for it. Yes. It's fast as a flash and then over. You'll see.

"Just think. Now you're one step closer to the Senior Discount at the movies!"

Senior Scooter.  See It.  Believe It.

Sometimes you get busy, and get have to go.  And go. And go.  That's when a senior scooter can help you stay on target and, well, you'll see.

English is a Tough Language to Master

Once you've learned to correctly pronounce every word in the following poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world. If you find it tough going, do not despair, after all, English is a tough language.

"Nothing makes be feel so old as much as having to scroll down so far down my computer screen to fill out online forms with my year of birth!"

Have You Ever Been to Sane?

Travel to Far Away Places. I have been in Sane. It's not very far away actually. They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there. I have made several trips there, thanks to my friends, family and work.

sailboat in harbor

Vincent Van Gough: Family Tree

After much careful research, it has been discovered that the artist Vincent Van Gogh had many relatives in the Van Gough family tree. Among them were:

  1. His dizzy aunt:  Verti Gogh
  2. The brother who ate prunes:  Gotta Gogh
  3. The brother who  . . . . .

Pop N Fresh Obituary

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman Pop N Fresh died yesterday of a severe yeast infection. He was 71. Fresh was buried in one of the largest funeral ceremonies in recent years. Dozens of celebrities turned out, including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker . . .

"As you get older, don't attempt Sarcasm. Unless you are already fluent with it, you may hurt yourself."

Cat's In the Kettle

Did you ever think when you eat Chinese, It ain't pork or chicken, but a fat Siamese, Yet the food tastes great, so ya don't complain, But that's not chicken in your chicken chow mein. Seems to me I ordered sweet and sour pork, But Garfield's on my fork, He's purrin' here on my fork.

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